Foolish PR Campaigns For Fun. No Joke.

In a clear example of being too sexy for his shirt, this guy just doesn't know what to do with himself. And worse, the woman behind him has the tazer that made his hair stand up so nicely in the first place. She's acting like she doesn't...in her angelic white outfit with her dumb pout that seems to blurringly suggest, "Wha....wha? Me? Are you looking at me?" But we know she does. Pervert.  

A book about the internet. Now that's something anyone can wrap their tiny little mind around. A Book. On the Internet. Sweet. And only from J. Peterman can something so delightfully old-world and yet tragically new-wave emerge. Now we can quit this nonsense of spending time updating, researching, learning and understanding the world around us and simply open to a real-live well-worn and yellowed page and experience life the way it was supposed to be experienced...under our covers with a flashlight and a half-eaten sandwich. Now that's progress! Right at your fingertips! Buy it here.

In other online news, Google introduced Google Translate for Animals today in it's beta form. Talk about being progressively animal friendly! The Android-ready app promises to encourage interaction and understanding between animal and human. Maybe it's too late for Sandra Bullock or Elin Nordegren, but the rest of us certainly appreciate a bone.

ThinkGeek, stuff for smart mASSES launched a food service campaign that will most likely prove to be the proof in the pudding why American children are winning the fight to be obese. It's called Squeeze Bacon and it's delicious.

And if you love bacon as much as the next person (as long as you are not sitting by me) then for sure you should invest in the "My First Bacon" children's toy because like the advertisement says, "You've got a friend in meat." Cute. Very cute.

And for all my rollerblade loving male friends and foes, you'll be happy to know that you now can be recognized as part of an exclusive community that in the past only chest thumping, beer can guzzling mountain men could belong to. Recent research indicates that rollerblading has been determined to be the "manliest sport," of them all. Wow. Don't believe me? Just look at the empirical evidence. If there is one thing I learned from working in corporate America, it's that creativity and integrity have no place in the executive suite no more than they are welcome in the marketing department. Instead, make things happen via powerpoint, is what I like to say. And what's better than powerpoint? Excel charts and pivot tables. Enjoy!