Thursday, November 14, 2013

Snapchat bets on bacon

If there was one piece of advice I could offer to anyone anywhere, it would be this: bet on bacon. 

Don't know what to make for dinner? Make bacon. 

Having a fundraiser and want to bribe a big crowd to show with tasty delights? Serve bacon.

Going to the VMA's on Sunday and want to get more attention than Miley Cyrus? Wear bacon. 

Have a bucket of money you want to dump into solid investments? Bet on bacon. 

Try it. Think up a problem and hardly a solution could not be more improved than adding a dash of hope and a strip of bacon. It's fun. Seriously, try it. 

I'm sure that the folks behind Twitter are eating a ton of back fat goodness, now that the company is rolling in as what some investors and financial industry writers (Forbes) are calling a very bright start as "the most expensive large-cap company on the New York Stock Exchange."

And Instagrams's 13 employees definitely eat as much bacon as they want since Facebook bought it last year. The photo-sharing application is free to users and is worth more than the New York Times. It has more than 30 million users and Facebook bought it last year for over a billion dollars. That's a lot of bacon.

Which brings us to Snapchat, the little instant image-sharing app that self-destructs the content of a sent message within a 10-second time period once the receiver starts a download. Recent news sources reported that Snapchat founder Evan Spiegel rejected a $3 billion offer from Facebook. The industry is in uproars with the idea that a 23-year-old tech founder could dare go against the great tides of the almighty Facebook. People are wondering how immature and stupid Evan is with his decision to say no thanks, but I think that's the point. The idea of Snapchat is not for everyone. Facebook is for everyone. If Snapchat took the deal, they would have to walk away from their business and Evan does not seem ready to let it go. And that's his choice. Don't you remember what it's like being 23? I was much hope, so much energy, so little that could dissuade me from thinking that the world really was my oyster. That was fun. More people should be 23, donchathink?

I think it takes a lot of bacon to walk away from Facebook and it's $3 billion offer. Kudos to Evan and the Snapchat team. I'm sure their biggest fans will become even more loyal and if I were a betting person, I would bet that this move is a strategic move that will ultimately result in an even larger fanbase for Snapchat. 

Tuesday, November 12, 2013

Bacn is almost as good as bacon

Or rather, for those who sweat like a pig, today is your lucky day. 

Enter bacon-scented deodorant. Yeah, that's right. Deodorant that makes your pits smell like a in, a smoking pit filled with piping hot pork goodness. 

Order a stick now, but just like the website says, "Do not eat or hike in the woods without a firearm while wearing POWER Bacon. 

In similar news, it's snowing in Chicago today, so -- fingers crossed -- our crime rate will dip and maybe, just maybe Chicago will fall from being recognized as America's murder capital of the nation. Recent reports tell a promising story of how police effort has led to nearly 6k illegal guns being removed from the streets and overall shootings are down 20% year over year, making recent stats the lowest murder rate in more than a decade. 

Finally, I just wanted to take a moment and applaud Gmail's latest attack on bacn. Bacn is email that a person subscribed to, but rarely reads. You know the stuff; it's better than spam but not nearly important as personal email. After a week of transitioning files, emails, photos and more from a PC to my new MacBook, I'm pretty excited about my current level of email organization, thanks mostly to Gmail's auto-tabs and filtering. Trans-fat or not, they make bacn almost good for you. 

Monday, November 11, 2013

Veterans Day in a single word.