Monday, August 31, 2009

Throttling Toward Your Own Sort of Marathon

Throttling? This unfortunately little verb actually has nothing to do with rocket science. Instead, it's a new buzzword describing a class-action suit brought up against movie rental folks because the claim is that certain avid movie watchers are feeling that they have been mistreated by companies like NetFlix, that mails movies out to subscribers. To throttle someone is to hold their movie back as they sit on their comfy couch - extra-buttered popcorn standing ready for consumption - with the lights dimmed and pillows appropriately propping up their heads so the only real movement is between the thumb and the remote control. And maybe a little seat rearranging after the first movie marathon session...

Oh, I don't know. It all sounds a little embarrassing. It would be slightly embarrassing to have to take the witness stand and complain that you feel the need for financial compensation because you had to wait to watch a movie. In the comfort of your own home. With extra-buttered popcorn. Because there is only so much injustice a person can withstand in this world. Wah. Wah. Wah.

Then again, it's rather embarrassing that a company would make a product that they hope only gets just so successful. I mean, if this idea of renting movies via snail-mail takes off, these companies may actually have to hire more people in order to service more people. It's a viscious business cycle that only can be met with strategies of sabotage, no doubt. I understand the idea of a point of diminished returns, but come on people. How lazy are we? Do we want to own successful businesses? Do we want to be lazy bums? How many of us are going to run 5 miles today in preparation for an upcoming (and fastly approaching) half marathon? How many of us are wasting time right now?