Giuseppe Must Have Been Omnipotent

Buy a friend. Get a fan. Go on a date. Whatever.

It's all the same to me, kid.

The crucial elements are all the same in order for a transaction to be completed; currency, dialogue, mutually benefitting arrangements aaaaaannnnd SCENE. Deal over and out. What am I talking about? Social shopping, of course. Duh.

Here is an example;
Dude #1: I was out last night.
Dude #2: No you weren't.
Dude #1: I was. I went to that new place.
Dude #2: No you didn't. I didn't see you check in.
Dude #1: That's because I was on a date. (Holding up his iPad and shaking it ever so slightly.) With a REAL girl. 

In a strange and crushingly absurd correlation, has anyone ever purchased a friend? Have you ever wanted to make a friend into a pet? I shit you not, you can do it. Go ahead, check out!/friendsforsale and learn what it is exactly that has garnered more than 1 million fans across the Facebook frontier. While you are doing it, though, try not to judge those who do, because you never know where you will find yourself in this adventure we call life.

I guess what I am talking about today is human truths. In particular, I am talking about human truths when it comes to the field of emerging technology and social media. But when I state it that way, even I feel my eyes rolling back and my lids lowering in pure exhaustion.

The fact is, that the very idea of social shopping works so well because we are talking about reaching a person when they are asking to be reached. It's the pizza delivery promise in a relationship-based reality. When someone is seeking companionship, entertainment, courtship, adventure, conversation, interaction; social media has the power to deliver those experiences, piping hot in less than 30 minutes, right to your front stoop. Many tools in the social media repertoire allow people to reach other people whose specific needs are often similar; or in the very least, offer an array of custom order options. You want pepperoni, mushroom but no onion at all? Done. Only onion and no pineapple, please? Okay. And still, when that pizza dude delivers, there is still an aura of surprise and engagement and lust that likely makes us want to return the next time we seek such (human) interaction.

The danger here is two-fold. One, we can get addicted to feeding the need. And two, we can lose touch with actually being touched.

People that talk only in 140 character sentences. People that look at any new experience through a webcam and a webcam only. People that attend keynote speakers and never once make eye contact with anything other than their palmed mobile device. People that read and write but have never done. All CEO's and no factory workers. All business owners and no customers. That's the danger in living in any one dimension exclusively. We lose touch because we think we are so well connected.

And there are dangers to a social life, as well. Imagine walking into a bar, and tap, tap, tapping on the crystal face of your watch while yelling into the crowded room, "Who wants to come home with me tonite?"

Chances are, someone is going to take you up on your offer. And why not? You are soooooo popular. 

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