Monday, February 8, 2016

A Clear Need For More Diversity in Australia

So the good news is that I have finally memorized my Australian phone number. 


The bad news is that Australia does not have Twizzlers. Which means I am very close to sending a resume and business proposal to the Twizzler head office back in the US and make a case for why they need to expand into the land down under in a big way. 

I realize the hilarity of this scenario. Australia. Australian licorice. Perhaps Twizzler decided to strategically avoid this market due to magic and wizardy of the unknown Australia licorice underworld; a black market, dare I say. I mean, I KNOW we're not in Kansas anymore, Toto. It's the wonderful world of Oz. Land of cricket, rugby, football, spiders, ants and snakes. All that jazz. But seriously, where have all the Twizzlers gone?

And more importantly, how to bring them here. It's not as easy as bringing sexy back. But I think it may be worth it. If there is anything that a land full of one thing (black licorice) needs most, it's Twizzlers, or ya know, diversity. I would probably settle on my luggage arriving from America, now that I have been in my host country for more than a month. But Twizzlers would be nice, too. 

Also, I would enjoy cars that drive on the right side of the road. Because now I can do both. I drug my feet at first. I whined. I complained. I was super afraid that I was going to kill my whole family or another carful of decent human beings. But then I charged through all the discomfort and made it to the other side. Now I'm a little embarrassed that I resisted so much. It's not a perfect relationship, but every day gets a little easier. But when I'm tired, eating, drinking, chewing gum, reaching for a pen, trying to scratch my calf, checking to see if I forgot something or something just fell over and is spilling around in the back of the car, well I gotta admit, I default to driving on the right side of the road. And let's face it. Rarely am I simply just driving around, paying attention to the road like a grown ass adult should do, not trying to multitask or daydream or maybe take a little extra mental time for myself. Which means that I now celebrate being able to chew gum AND drive at the same time. 

Which is not much to celebrate, I realize, but if there is one thing I am learning in this adventure 9000 miles away from my comfort zone, it's to celebrate the small stuff. 

Like Twizzlers.