Thursday, September 10, 2015

Proof that even good products can have bad advertising and still work

This morning on my way to work while driving the baby to school, I heard an ad on the radio (how old does that make me sound, geez) and this time I actually listened. (Imagine that. A baby so quiet in the backseat that I can actively listen to a radio ad? I must have a lot on my mind, huh?)

Anyway, I listened to this ad for Flonase. The nose spray that keeps allergies away, you know the one. I know the one. I take it. It works. 

But here is the commercial:

"The only thing worse than being stuck in a traffic jam is being stuck in a traffic jam with allergies." 

And I thought about that for a moment before my brain exploded. 

Really? Really?? REALLY, Flonase? 

What is worse; allergies or a dislocated IUD? Allergies or steaming hot coffee spilled in your lap? Allergies or a projectile vomiting baby from the backseat? Allergies or a friend with cancer? Allergies or a divorce? Allergies or a closet full of pants that don't quite seem to fit? Allergies or a cat? (I hate cats, sorry not sorry.)

Then I continued thinking and growing more irritated with the very idea that someone somewhere thought allergies were the only thing that would make being stuck in a traffic jam on a long commute worse. And I cursed them. What privileged lives they lead. What lackadaisical legal experts they get to work with. What lucky bastards they must be!

The only thing worse than being stuck in your car on a bad commute is being stuck in your car with a rabid dog foaming at the mouth; wasp nest that just got knocked over; a tub of maple syrup or garlic mayonaise that just exploded at your feet; a brother in law who ate a really bad burrito last night; any of the Kardashians & all their tomfoolery; not just one, but two children who hate everything you stand for and demand to tell you for the entire trip; etc. The point is, there is no humanly possible way that the only thing worse than being trapped in a car is being trapped in a car with allergies. That's just silly. 

The real injustice is the fact that I want to know how on god's green earth a lawyer out there legally approved the copy for this ad? 

A lawyer in the pharm world actually didn't require the creative director to provide visual graphs and attribution to studies that prove with empirical findings, that in fact, the ONLY thing worse than being stuck in traffic is being stuck in traffic with allergies. 

I mean, it does suck. But it could suck a whole lot more. 

Also, please note that I did not listen to the rest of the commercial after my mind exploded, so these lawyers could have very well added a line or two about not being able to substantiate their claims and all that jazz, but I don't care. I've used Flonase and I know it works.

Also, I had a baby that had unwrapped an entire roll of Scotch tape in my backseat to deal with.